Opening Question:

When you need advice about something important, who is the first person you usually go to? What makes you trust their opinion?

Key Takeaways:

• Asking for advice is wise, but not every piece of advice is worth following.
• The people closest to us can have a lot of influence over us, but access to our life doesn’t automatically mean someone should have authority in our life.
• Proverbs 13:20 reminds us that the people we surround ourselves with can shape who we become.
• Wise advice often comes from people who have experience, character, and a life worth learning from.
• Sometimes we aren’t really looking for wisdom—we’re looking for someone to agree with what we already want.
• Rehoboam rejected wise advice and kept listening until he heard the answer he wanted.
• God’s Word gives us a standard to check the voices and advice we receive.
• The goal isn’t to find the advice we like most. It’s to become willing to hear truth, even when it challenges us.

Discussion Questions:

Part 1: Not Everybody With Access Should Have Authority

1. Read 1 Kings 12:6–11. Rehoboam listened to the elders and then to the people he had grown up with. Why do you think advice from people we’re close to can sometimes carry more weight than advice from someone who may be wiser?
2. The message said, “Not everybody with access should have authority.” What do you think the difference is between someone having access to your life and having authority or influence in your life?
3. Proverbs 13:20 says, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Think about the people whose opinions influence you most. How are those relationships shaping the person you are becoming?

Part 2: Look at Where the Advice Is Leading

1. Rehoboam had access to elders who had served his father, Solomon, but instead chose the advice of people with less experience. What can someone’s life, character, and past decisions tell you about whether their advice is worth following?
2. The message said, “Don’t take directions from somebody you wouldn’t trade destinations with.” What do you think that means? Are there areas where you’ve been taking advice from someone whose choices or character you wouldn’t actually want to copy?

Part 3: Ask for Wisdom, Not Agreement

1. Read 1 Kings 12:8 again. Rehoboam received advice from the elders, rejected it, and went looking somewhere else. What do you think his response reveals about what he actually wanted?
2. 2 Timothy 4:3 describes people surrounding themselves with voices that tell them what they want to hear. Why is it so easy to look for agreement instead of truth when we’ve already decided what we want?
3. Think about the last time someone gave you advice you didn’t like. How did you respond? What could your response to correction reveal about whether you’re actually looking for wisdom?

Part 4: Check Every Voice Against God’s Word

1. Psalm 119:105 describes God’s Word as “a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” If you’re new to the Bible, that simply means Scripture can help give direction when you’re unsure where to go. What do you think it could practically look like to check the advice you receive against what God says?
2. What should you do when advice sounds good, comes from someone you trust, or is what you want to hear—but doesn’t line up with what God says?
3. Think about a decision, relationship, situation, or question you’re facing right now. Whose voices are influencing you most, and is there a voice you may need to listen to more—or less—this week?